Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Reuben: "LOOK, Mama, a NAZI!"
Mama: "WHAT? Where?!"
Reuben: "Right over there. A Nazi, Mama, look! Right there in front of the station!"
Mama cranes her neck to look around and sees no Nazis.
Reese: "Reuben---do you mean a taxi?"
Reuben: "Yeah, Mama, a taxi! Look!"
Monday, November 30, 2009
I took them Trick-or-Treating in Fairhaven on the afternoon of Halloween, and despite the gads of people, we got quite a few looks. A group of Japanese tourists even pulled Reuben aside, posed him against a pole, and took pictures of him. Ha!
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Ari is 8 weeks old today.
In the meantime, here's a recipe for a fabulous fall soup we tried recently--we loved it and I know you will too. This recipe comes from The Whole Life Nutrition Cookbook written by Alissa Segersten and Tom Malterre--our local co-op's resident nutritionists.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
"Do you want to look in my belly-button?"
To Sean (shouting): "SING THE BARBIE SONG!"
Running into our bedroom first thing in the morning: "I asked God to give me a dream about caterpillars, but He didn't. He gave me a dream about bees."
Crawling into bed, whispering: "God, I don't want to have any dreams. Don't give me any, okay?"
"Ella has nice teeth."
"I'm a human."
(holding a cup of water): "I am NACHO LIBRE. Remember? He has water?"
"When I was a baby, what did you call me?" ("We called you Reuben.") "OH."
Next day, looking worried: "When Ari is all growed up, what will we call HIM?!" ("Ari.") "Oh."
Wide-eyed, walking out of the bathroom wearing only a teeshirt: "I'm 'posed to have underwear on but I don't. IT'S MAGIC!"
Reese (bored): "You peed them dead."
Reuben: "No, I didn't."
Reese (moving on to something better): "You shot them right off."
Reuben: "No!" Runs back into bathroom and emerges holding the elusive spiderman pants.
"Here them is! THEY WERE IN THE BATHROOM!"
Monday, October 5, 2009
Friday, September 18, 2009
Monday, September 14, 2009
Hope to be back soon with some more photos to send your way...that is, if I can stop snuggling with him long enough to actually take some!
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Thursday, August 20, 2009
We are on track (and registered!) for a hospital delivery and I found an obstetrician that has agreed to take us on. I was reassured several times by the doctor & labor nurse that Baby is healthy and happy! But we are not out of the woods, by any means---there are still many decisions that will need to be made over the next few days, and we appreciate any prayers you can send our way as we navigate gingerly through each obstacle.
We are super thankful to know that the baby is okay and to have a (tentative) plan in place. I am also thankful to be able to tell you that we both feel a lot of peace with the decisions that have already been made! More decisions will be made on Monday if we make it that far. If labor starts in the next couple of days, we may have to sort of "wing it"--so we are praying for grace & wisdom with those spur-of-the-moment decisions.
Thank you for your continued love and support! We hope to be able to announce the arrival of our newest baby soon!
Monday, August 17, 2009
In my dream there was another baby, too, also a boy, that I knew I had delivered the day before. He was smaller, quieter, weaker, and I knew he was the baby that we lost in the fall, but he was alive, here, and in the dream Justin and I made the decision to raise the babies as twins--even though we knew they weren't. (I also dreamed that I delivered the babies at Half-Price Books...but we won't talk about that here.) We packed up the boys to take them home and I remember feeling so overwhelmed at the blessing God had chosen to bestow...even though it was different than what we may have originally anticipated.
I woke from my dream finally feeling like we have (almost) come full-circle. It has been almost exactly a year since we started down the road of that first pregnancy--the one that was lost. One year. One long year! My dream made me realize suddenly that the birth of this child will finally close that chapter for us, for me. I don't think I recognized that it hadn't yet ended in my mind. This baby, this life, was meant to be. Just another little piece of our story--and a daily reminder to this mama that God works all things together for the good of those who love him.
Can't wait to look upon that face and know that somewhere in my heart, I have always known and loved him.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Saturday, August 8, 2009
he is here, and i must depend on him more and more. he comes up behind me as i cook at the stove and puts his arms around my belly, holding it up against gravity for just a few moments, and there is instant relief from the pain--what one cannot manage is not too much for two. he is carrying all of us now, having to intuit where the gaps lie and fill them, smooth them over... and yet it is i--the one who has no strength left--who must rise up on that fated day and somehow find the effort to give life, and breath, and voice to that searing fire...]
"Our bodies are what we first give to each other as families--as husband and wife, in labor, in birth, and what we leave at death...In order to cherish the body--both those of others and our own--we must first recognize the inescapable fact that it will one day break down and turn to dust. This should trigger a certain urgency in us to care for one another's arms, feet, and face and to enjoy each and every stage a body passes through on its journey from birth to death.
"...Families everywhere must be fed, sheltered, warmed, and held...but in the end it is the way in which we do these everyday tasks, the spirit in which they are done, that determines the atmosphere of a family. It is the way we feed each other, bathe, groom, clothe and lay us down at night that makes a family...When a husband yells from the bathroom, 'Hey, want your hair washed tonight?' it isn't only hair that gets salon treatment, so does the whole self.
"...Families are complicated weavings of light and dark, of hurt and healing. We will hurt each other in ways we didn't intend. We will even hurt each other intentionally...but our hands can heal...anyone who lays on hands gets attached to life...unlike the mind, a body is never without sensing, even in sleep. A body will always remember" [exerpts from The Art of Family, by Gina Bria]
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Mama: "Oh yeah? Like what?"
Cole: "What do you want to know about? The colors, or the missing?"
Mama: "The missing."
Cole: "Well, I don't think there will be any ambulances, or fire engines, or police cars."
Mama: "That's probably true. But what do you think heaven will be like? Do you think there will be foods there that you have never seen before?"
Cole: "You mean like MOON CHEESE?!"
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Friday, July 10, 2009
Is it really already July?
Despite the apparent confusion--things in our house are going well. I'm a couple of weeks into my new diet now and feeling quite comfortable with checking my blood sugars & ketones regularly and making the appropriate alterations as needed to make sure all the numbers stay in a safe range. (I even figured out a way to get to have a bowl of popcorn with peanut m&ms in it as a treat last night--no starchy carbohydrates at dinner!) Important things, you know. Since my last post I've seen the endocrinologist once, the diabetes counselor (again), and had another prenatal appointment. All of my numbers are looking very, very good, and I've been told by the counselor that I don't have to come back and meet with her anymore as long as I keep up with the endocrinologist. Baby measured 35 cms this morning, and I'm nearly 34 weeks! How's that for catching up!
I'm feeling far better than I've felt in months. Lots more energy. I am happily eating copious amounts of steak and wild Alaskan salmon (sigh) and filling in the gaps with every vegetable I can set my sights on. I'm learning to curb my red potato addiction...and am trying not to think about all of the summer fruit that is currently, beautifully in season. The boundaries are a little difficult to adhere to at times, but the payoff has been so great.
The boys are spending their days playing in the dirt pit out front, catching flies out of the air with their bare hands, trying to find ways to earn money for Legos, and eating me out of house and home. The usual. We're s-l-o-w-l-y checking things off of our to-do list, trying to prepare for having a bit of "down time" once Baby decides to make an appearance--whenever that may be. Cole's birthday is on Saturday and we ordered---SHHHH---a junior (not TOY) metal detector for him, and it came in the mail the other day. I can hardly wait to give it to him and to go out "treasure hunting" with him for the first time. I think you're going to find us spending a lot of spare time at the parks and beaches in the coming weeks.
That's all for now, I guess. The two littlest ones are napping...I'm going to jump on the bandwagon and doze on the couch for a bit before entering into life here again.
Friday, June 26, 2009
I'm not thrilled to have a positive diagnosis, obviously. But there is some relief in knowing why sugars have been bothering me so much during this pregnancy, and knowing that there are people out there who are able to help me keep my levels more in line. Just in the last few days, I have altered parts of my diet on my own and have noticed a HUGE change in my energy levels and overall well-being. It's empowering to feel like I can affect change so quickly. And I'm loving being able to focus on the boys more without feeling so loggy all the time.
So, the next question is: Where do we go from here? At this point, I still have a chance of delivering with the midwife, but that may change depending on how the next few weeks go. I had my regular prenatal appointment this morning and it was FABULOUS--this belly is still measuring 34 cm (only 2 1/2 cm ahead now!) and Baby is now head-down (there was actually a moment this week when Justin and I were talking and suddenly my stomach gave a huge gelatinous SHAKE--Justin said, "wow, did the baby just flip or what?!")....all good reports. We spent a lot of good time talking about gestational diabetes and what it all means, and I left there really feeling like everything was going to work out beautifully.
This afternoon, I met with the hospital dietician/diabetes counselor to talk more in-depth about my unique situation and what the options are for change. I think I went into it pretty well-informed, but still I felt like my head was swimming a bit when I left a short hour later (though that may just be my pregnant brain!). So I think the next few days will be key as I actually start putting some of this stuff into effect--watching my foods carefully and charting my blood sugar numbers. I have to meet with an endocrinologist on Tuesday and I am anticipating that I'll be feeling like it is all "old-hat" by then, ha!
I am so appreciative of all of your prayers as we navigate these new waters. There are still several things up in the air about how exactly this delivery will go, but I'm not feeling anxious about any of the details.
"Praise the Lord, O Jerusalem! Praise your God, O Zion! For He has strengthened the bars of your gates; He has blessed your children within you!" psalm 147 12-13
Monday, June 22, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
Monday, June 15, 2009
I got my test results today and they came back one point above the level that is considered normal. Or safe. Or whatever. So...it's probably not much to worry about, but all things considered, it's best that we go through the next level of testing. I'll go into the lab and complete those tests on Friday. It requires an 8 hour (overnight) fast, an early morning blood draw, a new bottle of Super Charged Crazy Juice, and three subsequent blood draws at one hour intervals throughout the morning. (Sidenote: I have to take the Volvo to the shop that morning, and Justin and I giggled at the thought of me trying to run errands in between blood draws all hyped up and turned loose on the town in the loaner car...) I'm planning on bringing my Book Club book and getting some good reading done while hanging out at the lab for HALF THE DAY. Or, alternately, going into Said Coma on the floor there and drooling. We'll see how it all turns out.
Saturday, June 13, 2009
On a more comical note, I had a dream early yesterday morning that I was in a garden and everywhere I looked, there were HUGE green cabbages so ripe that they were falling off the vines, so ready were they to be harvested. Then I dreamt that I woke up from that dream, to find I was in labor with contractions 2 minutes apart. And I lay in bed (in my dream) and thought, "Hmmm, better call the midwife, she'll have to deliver here instead of at the birth center....WOW I wish I had cleaned my room!"
So if any of you are looking for me the next few days, I will be cleaning my room. And washing the newborn clothes. And setting up the cradle. You know--just in case!
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Are you ready for this?
Cole: "Well, here's what I'm thinking." (Mama is cringing.) "I love them SOOO much, and I think they're SOOO pretty....how about if we cut off their heads, and keep them? You know, like in a glass box? With their eyes open?"
Saturday, May 30, 2009
The stats: Last time I met with the midwife, I was 24 weeks but the baby was measuring 25. That's normal for me--I always measure big, but I also have big babies. The strange part of it was that I didn't believe I was even 24 weeks along (because of my miscarriage in the fall we have been unable to determine an actual due date) so I was surprised to be measuring 25 weeks!
Yesterday, the midwife went to measure my stomach and seemed confused. She kept putting the measuring tape down, feeling the baby, measuring, putting the tape down, feeling again. Finally she wrote something down and then went for the doppler, checking Baby's heartbeat (140 bpm). So I asked: What am I measuring this week? Her answer: Well, you're a bit big. Me: How big? The midwife: 33.
Thirty-three! Holy moly. By all accounts I should maybe be 28 weeks along. Thirty three is a BIG difference. I've never been THAT far off before. Wowzers.
So here's what I'm thinking. Either I'm having a HUGE baby in August sometime, or I should be ready to deliver in, like, July. And from the beginning we've been thinking this babe would come in September.
So, that's where we sit. I think the whole thing is rather comical. It certainly gives credence to the additional aches & pains I've accumulated the last four weeks! I'm far enough along that an ultrasound wouldn't give any answers....so we're in the "wait and see" mode. I'll go back in on June 11th and we'll see what's happening then. Stay tuned!
Friday, May 29, 2009
Thursday, May 21, 2009
This recipe comes from my Vegetarian Planet cookbook, by Didi Emmons. These amounts serve 4--I usually make a double batch so I can eat it the next morning for breakfast, too (if we're being honest)
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Mama: "Reuben! What do you say?"
Reuben: "Toot toot! TIME TO LEAVE THE STATION!"
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Monday, April 6, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
and I love that Reese thinks that the LGMs are a representation of the trinity, because they say they are one
and I love that Cole thinks the name of the crayon is "Violent Red"
and I love that Sean gets his monkey and climbs up and lays on the couch with me when I read at night
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Friday, March 6, 2009
Cole: I love you.
Reese: (no answer)
Reuben: Let's go!
What makes your mom happy?
Cole: That her kids love her.
Reese: Happy face.
What makes your mom sad?
Cole: When we disobey.
Reese: Being naughty.
How does your mom make you laugh?
Cole: By telling us jokes!
Reese: I don't know, jokes?
Reuben: Madagascar 2 caterpillar.
What did your mom like to do when she was a child?
Reese: Play games.
Reuben: Play with my boys.
How old is your mom?
How tall is she?
Cole: 6 feet.
Reese: 50 feet.
What is your mom's favorite thing to do?
Cole: Take care of her children.
Reese: Pick berries.
Reuben: Play together.
What does your mom do when you're not around?
Cole: Take a rest.
Reese: I have no idea because when I go somewhere, I don't know what you do.
Reuben: The computer.
If your mom became famous, what would she be famous for?
Cole: Having 5 kids! (yes, we have one on the way!)
Reese: (no answer)
What is one thing your mom is good at?
Cole: Taking care of her children.
Reese: The computer.
What is one thing your mom is not very good at?
Cole: Building houses.
What does your mom do for a job?
Cole: Takes care of her children.
Reese: To tell us to do the dishwasher.
Reuben: Doing the dishwasher!
What is your mom's favorite food?
Reese: Those little cabbages, what are they called? (Brussel sprouts?) Yeah, yeah, brussel sprouts!
Reuben: Eggs and toast.
What makes you proud of your mom?
Cole: That you take care of us.
Reese: That you can feed us.
Reuben: Make mine birthday cake.
If your mom was a cartoon character, who would she be?
Reese: A space man.
Reuben: Star wars.
What do you and your mom like to do together?
Cole: Do school.
Reese: Go to the Daisy Cafe.
How are you and your mom the same?
Cole: We both have big feet.
Reese: Our skin is the same.
Reuben: Same kissing.
How are you and your mom different?
Cole: I'm young, and you are old.
Reese: You have spider veins, and I don't.
Reuben: You change into Dad.
How do you know your mom loves you?
Cole: Because she always has.
Reese: Because I always think about it.
Reuben: Me be special.
What does your mom love most about your dad?
Cole: He's handsome.
Reese: He gives you kisses a lot.
Reuben: Him special.
Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
Cole: To a fancy restaurant.
Reese: Red Robin for her birthday.
Reuben: At Robin.
Isn't having children enlightening?
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Reese: "So Mom, does it go: 'Baby, Daddy, Fat, Old'?"
Mama: "Excuse me?"
Reese: "Does it go 'Baby, Daddy, Fat, Old'?" (I love how they always repeat it verbatim...as though there is a CHANCE I might have the slightest idea what they're referencing)
Mama: "I'm sorry, Baby, I don't know what you're asking."
Cole (desperate to help): "You know, Mom, like living? Like the way we live? We start out as babies....then turn into kids....then daddies" (DOT DOT DOT)
Reese: "Then it goes to that other stuff...right?"
Now how would you have answered this question?
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Reuben (from said other room): "What?"
Mama: "Are you okay?"
Mama: "Are you okay?"
Mama: "Are you okay?"
Reuben: "What 'okay'?"
Mama: "Are you okay?"
Mama: "How are you?"
Reuben: "I doing good."
He wanders into the room and sits down beside me.
Reuben: "Mama, why you say 'Okay'?"
Mama: "I just wanted to make sure you were alright. I thought I heard you fall down. Did you fall down?"
Reuben: "Oh!" (He chuckles to himself): "No." He gives a big sigh.
"I just fell down."
Monday, February 2, 2009
REESE'S PET, by Reese
Once upon a time there lived Reese. He walked along and found a little pond. He saw a tadpole and he picked it up with a bucket. It was full of water and he put in the tadpole. The end.
REESE'S SEA STORY, by Reese
Once upon a time there was a turtle. He was swimming along. He scared hisself by getting caught by a net. A octopus saw the turtle! The octopus swam to the turtle. A froggy jumped down in the water. The froggy got to the turtle first. The froggy freed the turtle. And then it was the regular sea again. The end.
THE KNIGHT'S FIRST BATTLE, by Reese
First some knights wanted to do a battle. They saw lots of other people doing battle and they really wanted to do one. The knights looked around for some bad guys. And the queen said, "Go find some bad guys." The knights looked around in the bushes. And then they found bad guys. And then they raised their shields and helmets and spears and swords and stuff like that. And they were finally fighting about a green jewel and a red jewel.
RED POEM, by Cole
Red is a strawberry
Red is a raspberry
Red is a jewel
Red is an apple
Red smells like a flower
Red feels like softness
Red looks like a red rose
Red is for the most wondrous thing you can find in the earth.
GOLD POEM, by Reese
Gold is a goldfish
Gold is a jewel
Gold is gold
Gold is a banana
Gold smells like bananas
Gold feels like a banana
Gold looks like a yellow cup
THE QUEEN'S FIGHT, by Cole
One day there was a castle. And there was a good king that was two hundred years old. And he had two million knights guarding the castle. And one day a dragon came. It was a big, red, evil one. And he took the queen. And he took her two hundred miles away to the great evil castle. Which the evil king lived in the tallest building. And then below the big building, there was four small buildings on each corner of the big castle. And the dragon flew up to one of the small buildings which ten knights came to take the queen to the big building. And the stairs went around, and around, and around....there was four hundred steps. And they finally got the queen to the evil king's throne. Which the evil king said to her, "You are going in the dungeon for forty years. And when it's been forty years, if you are still alive, then we'll let you back to the castle. But if you are dead, then we will throw you in a pile of skeletons."
So they locked her up in jail with two hundred different locks. She stayed there for forty years. After forty years, the king had no queen at all, and then a woman came to the gate. It was the beautifulest girl the king had ever seen. And she said, "Your wife in jail is going to stay in there forever and I am the new queen." So the king married her and they had a lovely wedding. And there was a big feast at the end.
And then, ten minutes later, the real queen came home. And she said, "Let this queen go away!"
And suddenly the new queen turned into a bad guy witch. And the king was shocked to see how ugly this princess looked like! And the king called the guard as loud as he could. And they took her away. And the old queen said "I am the real queen." And then they lived happily ever after.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Saturday, January 24, 2009
But I accidentally let a chicken out of the gate and had to chase it around the yard, dropped an egg when I was taking care of the neighbor's animals, gave the rest of the eggs to Cole and watched him drop one right outside the back door, refilled the water jug and got it all the way next door before realizing it wasn't screwed on properly (it fell apart and dumped water all over the ground), thought to check the mail for the first time since Justin left, hoping for a paycheck (our first check since mid-November) and was instead surprised with a huge STACK of overdraft notices from the bank since I accidentally put the money into savings instead of checking, opened a notice from the gas company threatening to turn off my heat on Monday because I forgot to send the check... and I'm utterly unable to do anything about it today since the CU is closed and I'm locked from doing any more transfers online. And then while I was fuming about the bills, Reuben stomped on my bare foot wearing his winter boots and I yelled at the top of lungs, which caused him to BURST INTO TEARS. And then I burst into tears and then we sat on the couch together and CRIED.
So I'll check the mail again a bit later. But I'm pretty sure that the Mom Of The Year award will NOT be showing up in my box today.
Monday, January 19, 2009
To keep you out, to keep me in, to keep it safe
Oh, the sense of my own self-entitlement
To say who's wrong, who won't belong, who cannot stay
Cause somebody somewhere decided
We'd be better off divided
And somehow, despite the damage done--
He says, 'Come...'
Ever since I was a young child, I have always loved the image of huge, rustic banquet table. Yes, I love feasting!...but it is more that that--I love the picture of a table where no one is turned away. All are welcome, no one is cramped, and the wine and bread overflow. A celebration in its entirety.
My boys--Cole, especially--must have inherited this deep longing that I have for the fellowship and comraderie that reside in a banquet with food and room for all. He occasionally dreams aloud about the table in heaven and tries to estimate how long it must be! I love this because I believe that God's heart is for us to care less about determining where exactly all the little boundaries and differences between us lie, and instead to reach out, to love, to break bread together and live life in community.
Oh, the times when I have failed to recognize
How many chairs are gathered there around the feast
To break the bread and break these boundaries
That have kept us from our only common ground
The invitation to sit down
If we will come
There is room enough for all of us
And the arms are open wide enough
And our parts are never greater than the sum
This is the heart of the One
Who stands before an open door
And bids us 'Come'
I feel sometimes in this life like a child back in the schoolyard, hoping not to be picked last and feeling an ache in my heart for the one that is. Do we ever really outgrow this yearning to be welcomed into the fold? There have been too many times in my life--even as an adult--when I have been insensitive and uncaring to those waiting on the periphery for an invitation to be let in. There have been just as many times that I have waited, myself, for that invitation. The idea of a banquet table--my Lord's banquet table!--where there is a seat reserved for me, a glass of wine waiting in anticipation for my arrival, and One standing at the door to usher me in--well, it is almost more than I can bear. I can't think of anything greater than to be welcomed to the table of He who created the universe. I am absolutely humbled and terrifyingly overwhelmed.
Justin made me a table for Christmas.
It is seven feet long.
The table we have been using seats four comfortably. Four, and we are six...without any company! The new table is fashioned out of Justin's childhood table (in the middle, made of solid maple) and my childhood table (solid oak, cut in two and added to the ends). I cried and cried when I saw it. Not just because it is a "bigger table", but because it is a deep representation to me of the things God has been teaching me the last several years about having a truly welcoming and joyful spirit towards the people he brings my way--without reservation. It is the two of us, made better and stronger as one. It takes what was inadequate and makes it into something overflowing with purpose and life. God's provision for me abounds, and each time I am stretched, I experience more and more of his blessing. And as hard as it as gotten, that blessing is still so good, at its core, that I am absolutely unable to turn away and try it on my own! I am completely captivated by this life he has chosen for me.
There is room enough!
Thank you, Justin, for walking this journey with me, and for a gift that meets a need and speaks to my heart. It is functional and beautiful! I love every bit of it.